Why Are You Having A Really Difficult Engagement Response?

CP: Welcome to CP's Comforting Poultices. How may I help you?

Why Are You Having A Really Difficult Engagement Response: I'm picking up my prescription today. 

CP: I see we have a Medrol Dosepak ready phor you. 

WAYHARDER: Yes. How do I take it?

CP: You take the phirst two with breakfast then . . . 

WAYHARDER: I take my blood pressure and water pills at breakfast. I don't want to take them at the same time. 

CP: Ok. Well you can move the breakfast tablets to lunch and take 2 or 3 tablets then or. . . 

WAYHARDER: I take my other meds with lunch. 

CP: Um. 

WAYHARDER: Why can't I take them with breakfast?

UT: Didn't she just tell you she takes her morning meds with breakfast and didn't want to take them together?

CP: She did. 

UT: You just told us you didn't want to take your morning meds with these. 

WAYHARDER: Can I have a snack instead?

CP: The point of the dosing is to split the doses around normal phood schedules. Since you aren't normal, you have to adjust. You COULD take all 6 tablets together with any amount of phood you desire but, unless your stomach is lined with cast iron, I'd try to dissuade you phrom this endeavour. 

UT: Dinner, perhaps?

WAYHARDER: I don't eat dinner. 

CP: It's a good thing we've only made it to the phirst dose on the phirst day of these directions. I can't wait to see what happens when we get to "bedtime snack". 

UT: Only 19 more tablets to go. 

WAYHARDER: I'm usually not home for dinner. 

CP: You have a purse, non?

WAYHARDER: Yes. 

CP: Pills are portable. You could, and I'm just spitballin' here, maybe, consider putting pills in purse and potentially popping pills promptly. 

WAYHARDER: I like to keep all my medications on my table. 

CP: How do you get through a day, let alone life in general? Let's make this overly simple. Day 1, you must take all 6 tablets, in any way you desire, with phood. Whatever time that is, wherever that is, with whomever that is. Day 2, you must take all 5 tablets that day. By "that day" I mean within the hours of waking and returning abed. Outside of those parameters, take them as you will. 

WAYHARDER: Should I separate the doses?

CP: <shrugs> It's up to you. The rules are simple: Take all 6 tablets today. Period. With phood. Period. Between now and sleepy time. Period. I now bid you adieu. 

UT: You usually explain how it's going to keep patients up at night, especially the later in the day they take them. 

CP: Right. You can either be awake and miserable, or awake and pheeling somewhat alleviated. I'm afraid that discussion would have complicated this consultation exponentially. 

WAYHARDER: Phair enough.