Disposable

CP: Que Sera Sera

CPP: Is this a reflective moment? 

CP: No. More an exercise in value. 

CPP: How do you mean?

CP: As our society has become more disposable, more single-use minded, many things should not be considered instantly disposable. 

CPP: You were watching "The Repair Shop" again, weren't you?

CP: Yes, it's quite addictive. But this example is a little less about temporal value and more about simplicity. 

CPP: Remember our old partner and her coffee pot? 

CP: Of course. 

CPP: Is this anything like that?

CP: Oddly, yes. I thought she was pretty unique but this rivals that for peculiarity. Why don't you set the scene?

 

CPP: I need a new coffee pot. 

CP: Why? What's wrong with it?

CPP: It's dirty. 

CP: Did you clean it?

CPP: Haha! No. 

CP: You don't know how? Or just didn't know you could do that?

CPP: Eww. Gross. It's dirty. I need a new one. 

CP: Vinegar?

CPP: Eww. I'm buying a new one.                     

CP: Just because it's dirty?

CPP: Yes. 

CPP: Your turn. 

CP:How may we help you?

Needs A Meter And Says They Expire: I need a new meter.

CP: What is the issue?

NAMASTE: I bought this one and now it no longer works.

CP: I see. What seems to be the trouble?

NAMASTE: It won't turn on, won't read the strips when it does, doesn't give me results. I need a new one.

CP: Have you tried troubleshooting it?

NAMASTE: Not sure how shooting it will help. Maybe when I get the new one. 

CP: <scritches scalp> How about a battery?

NAMASTE: I should beat it and shoot it?

CP: New battery. CR 2032. 

NAMASTE: It would be easier to buy a new meter. This one is bad. 

CP: It's less than a year old judging by that receipt you brought. 

NAMASTE: They must go bad. 

CP: Yes. Batteries die. Do you own a watch?

NAMASTE: Yes, a nice Seiko. 

CP: Hmm. I own a few Special Edition collector watches. They all require batteries. You mean to tell me that I should just throw them away and buy new, collector-edition watches instead of replacing the batteries?

NAMASTE: It would be easier.And it's guaranteed to work right away. 

CP: Umm. Hmm. I. . . Let me grab you a battery. If that fixes it, problem solved. If not, we can send you over to the Meter Maids who can fit you for a new meter. 

NAMASTE: But I want the same one. 

CP: Right. BRB. 

NAMASTE: Well?

CP: Success! It works!

NAMASTE: Will I get a new meter if this happens again?

CP: No. You will replace this battery with the second battery from the 2-pack you are about to purchase; the one missing the battery I just used. 

NAMASTE: I still think a new meter would have been easier. 

#Tosser