Facebook and Twitter


and follow my blog on Twitter @pharmacynic to receive notifications on new posts.

Sunday, January 24, 2021

Tickets!

CPP: What is one thing that could make the COVID vaccine distribution system worse?
CP: Tickets.
CPP: Like Willy Wonka and the Golden Tickets?
CP: No. The only thing that could make this system truly worse would be if someone decided patients had to have tickets to receive a shot and they put Ticketmaster in charge. 
CPP: Don't give them any ideas. 
CP: It's such a corrupt, inefficient system, how did the government not glom on to it?
CPP: Everyone would be sitting at their laptops or shaking their mobiles whilst waiting for the site to load at 10am. 
CP: Getting frustrated trying to remember their account information; or if they even have one. Then playing the "I am not a robot" game again, and again.
CPP: First hit only a few seconds in to the game! You'd be offered a ticket in the nosebleed section or, in this case, another state. 
CP: Because that was already the "best available". Then you'd attempt to trade those in for another shot at something closer to the stage. 
CPP: And you'd get "no tickets available". 
CP: How are there not tickets available? They just went on sale 42 seconds ago!
CPP: Then you'd have to refresh the screen and hope you get another hit. 
CP: Or that someone wasn't fast enough with their credit card and the system timed out on them. Lather, rinse, repeat.
CPP: Then you cut it down to "any seat in any COVID vaccine clinic within 100 miles of the stage" and you get one ticket behind the stage, in a non-contiguous county.
CP: And you take it. 
CPP: Phew. What a way to start your day at 10am. 
CP: And it's now only 10:02 am and the tickets are sold out. 
CPP: Except you still need one for you or another parent/family member. 
CP: Enter the ticket brokers and scalpers!
CPP: Resale sites would abound with desperate patients looking to score a closer ticket. 
CP: Can't you just see scalpers outside the pharmacy/health department/hospital/clinic? Some holding up a few fingers announcing "I got three! Three seats! Today only!"
CPP: And a few patients walking around or a mobile army of a wheelchair brigade rolling around the parking lots saying "we need five! anyone got five?" 
CP: It's definitely the American Way.  
CPP: Don't give the "Big Deuce" any ideas. They'd probably steal this idea and charge an extra "inconvenience fee" for the hassle they provided free of charge. 


No comments:

Post a Comment