Phollower Submissions

Not sure if you need any new stories but I have to share what happened today. Quite possibly the dumbest phone call ever.

A dad of a 4 year old just called to complain that we didn’t tell him how to take his daughters medication.

I asked him if there was a label on the bottle.

He said yes, it says to shake the powder and add water.

I told him that was the manufacturers label. Is there a Pharmacy label?

Him - yes, it says to shake the liquid well and give her.... oh. Well what happens if I already added water?
Me - Sir, why did you add water?
Him - because y’all didn’t tell me it was already mixed.
Me - How much water did you add?
Him - I don’t know, I turned on the faucet like I was making a bottle.
Me - ok, so you don’t know how much water you added to something you didn’t need to add water to?
Him - nobody told me it was mixed. Y’all should have told me it was already mixed.
Me - you’re complaining that we didn’t give you information that I haven’t had anyone ask me for in nearly 20 years? I’ve never had anyone not recognize it wasn’t mixed
Him - how would I know it was mixed?
Me - Um. It was liquid. In nearly 20 years I’ve never had anyone not know. I’m not sure what to say.
Him - you need to chose your words more wisely because what you're saying is calling me an idiot and I’m not. I don’t appreciate you and your 20 odd years and if I need to come down there and complain to the store manager I will. I’m not scared.
Me - ok, I’m not sure what to tell you at this point.
Him - well what am I supposed to do with this medication?
Me - well you have some options. You can guess how much water you have added and try to mathematically calculate the correct dose off of that. You can give her 5 mls of the bottle you diluted and hope she gets better, or you can buy a new bottle for 74 dollars.
Him - well I don’t have that kind of money.
Me - I guess you can underdose her then.
Him - fine.

And he hung up

CP: All I can think of is a Kool Aid analogy. Imagine you're thirsting for Tropical Punch Kool Aid. You stride into the kitchen to find a pitcher and packet of mix, already torn open, on the counter. You observe the pitcher contains a red liquid. Do you pick up the packet, read the directions and, again, observing there is a red liquid in the pitcher, continue to follow the directions and ADD water to the nearly full pitcher?

In the immortal words of Joe Hallenbeck, "water is wet, the sky is blue, and women have secrets".
That's all I can think to say. 
#WaterIsWet.