Dick And Jane Refreshed

Dick and Jane go to the pharmacy (in America). 

CP asks them for their dates of birth.

CP: Jane, what is your DOB? 

Jane: 3/6/79. 

CP: <types 03/06/1979> Danke! Here's your prescription.

Jane: Bitte 

CP: Same question, Dick. 

Dick: The eleventh of August, 1982. (Or however you know they respond that isn't mm/dd/yy.)

CP: Why are you the way you are?

Dick: I was in the military. 

CP: Does this look like a military installation to you? Did we salute when you entered? 

Dick: We are the only country that doesn't do it that way. Other countries say the day first. 

CP: I know. They're also all on the metric system. Shall I convert all your dosages? Do you request petrol in litres? I have plenty of military in my family. Never once did I go anywhere with my family and, when asked for dates of birth, did they respond with 5th of May, 1977. Never. They knew the person asking for the information was entering it the American way, not the military way, or the "everywhere else in the world" way. When you are asked to enter your DOB online in the MM/DD/YYYY format, do you adapt to this? Or do you try to force your birthdate in using your format? Do you ring customer service and complain "that's not how I was taught"? My foreign language in HS was German. They say their numbers as two-and-twenty for "22" (zwei und zwanzig). They'd be right at home singing "4 and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie". Mayhap I learned to count through that song. Yet I don't say my day of birth as three-and-twenty. The answer to "what is the meaning of life" is not "two and forty", but "42". Sure, you sound cool to yourself. But you're a dick to everyone else. 

Dick: We're the only ones who. . . 

CP: No. YOU'RE the only one who does this. I start typing "11" then have to back up and fix it all because you think you're being cute. <whiny voice "military does it like this. other countries do it like this, wahhh".> Are we on base?

Dick: No. 

CP: In a country outside the USA?

Dick: No. 

CP: Could you adapt to the current situation? Which I'm sure is part of your military training? Happy, smile. Sad, frown. Use the corresponding face with the corresponding emotion. Give the correct answer to the correct audience. 

Dick: Well, I. . . 

CP: Then don't be a dick.