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Friday, October 21, 2022

Unsolicited Interruptive "Advice"

<overheard conservation at the counter between UT and a Flu Shot Inquiring Talker>

FLUSH-IT: I would like a flu shot. 
UT: I just need you to complete this form for me. 
FLUSH-IT: Okay. Can I also get my Covid Booster? Or should I wait?
UT: You can get both. . . 
Totally Random Old Lady Lurking In Aisle: Huh-uh. No. You shouldn't do that. 
UT: Bitch? Dafuq?
FLUSH-IT: Why? 
TROLLIA: My niece got them both. She never does that but she did and she got sick for like two days. Couldn't move her arms or nothing. 
UT: Probably an exaggeration but. . . 
FLUSH-IT: Um. 
TROLLIA: I mean I wouldn't do it. But "everyone is different, except me. I'm not". 
CP: Did she actually say "everyone is different but I'm not"? 
UT: Uh-huh. 
CP: Hunh. 
UT: So about those shots?
FLUSH-IT: Yeah. I'll get both. 
CP: I think, after I retire, I'm going to go hang out in random pharmacies and start eavesdropping on counter conversations. Then I can offer unsolicited advice when people ask questions. 
UT: Except you'll know what you're talking about. 
CP: No one will care. They'll take it regardless because I am a random eavesdropper and everyone appreciates the "hot tip" from a stranger. 
UT: Stop calling it a "hot tip" and trying to force it on strangers. 
CP: What? I have received no complaints about my flu shots. 
UT: Mmm-hmm. 

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