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Wednesday, January 8, 2020

New Year = Full Circle

ME: Happy New Year!
MYSELF: How can you tell it's Happy?
CP: Congratulations on spinning around the sun again?
ME: Well, when you look at it like that. . .
MYSELF: Technically, every day is a celebration of a new year. A year ago we were in this same spot in space. Hooray!
CP: Agreed. Circles are round. You will eventually come back to where it all started before being flung into the unknown, yet familiar void of the future.
MYSELF: Deja vu all over again.
ME: Can't I at least have a moment to share my post before you both circumambulate me with your circumscription?
MYSELF: Carry on.
CP: Is this about the Circle of Life discussion we had last week?
ME: It is. We were complaining about the complaint we received.
MYSELF: It really seems as if the only purpose complaints serve is to irritate those who receive them as they are often powerless to effect the change necessary to remedy the situation.
ME: Nice circumlocution.
CP: Moving on. The complaint stated the pharmacy was too busy, there were not enough employees to staff it properly, and the wait times were horrible.
MYSELF: Sounds logical.
ME: But the fact that our DM forwarded the complaint to the store with her own addendum of "please respond to the complaint and contact me with the resolution" was the coup de grace; the egg wash on the complaint pastry.
CP: <snickers>
MYSELF: What's so funny? What did I miss?
ME: The conference call.
CP: Mademoiselle DM led the conference call with a call to action. She said "we are going to start this year off right! I want absolutely NO EXCUSES! from anyone. Short-staffing is NOT an excuse and I won't tolerate it anymore!'.
MYSELF: Wow. Was she the ball that dropped in Times Square?
ME: Right? How did you respond?
CP: I replied to her that, since the patient's complaint mentioned we were understaffed and over busy, and that you (she) said those weren't excuses and excuses were not allowed, I told the patient everything was fine.
     Dear patient: Hope all is well. I spoke with my boss who invalidated your concerns by saying that, because short-staffing isn't "a thing" and therefore can't be used as an excuse, and she doesn't like excuses, your complaint is irrelevant. Please continue to use our pharmacy but change your opinion of us from one of dislike to tolerant. Better yet, like closing time at the bar, you need to lower your expectations. Once you do that you will see that we aren't so bad and maybe you'll take us home.
ME: How'd she take that?
CP: Pretty sure she still had her Flavor-Aid filled Rose-coloured VR goggles on when she read it. It appears as if she may have circumnavigated my reply.
MYSELF: My head hurts again. Maybe she realised that if short-staffing is not an excuse and she wants no excuses, then short-staffing is an acceptable answer and her brain collapsed in on itself.
ME: This whole thing gave me an aneurysm.
CP: But you still have to come in to work.

"It's okay
Had a bad day
Hands are bruised from breaking rocks all day.
Drained and blue
I bleed for you
You think it's funny, well
You're drowning in it too."

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