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Friday, August 1, 2014

Friday Special

With another weekend upon us, it is time for the Friday Special Requests we all love to get. Here are the questions, with a few real-life scenarios, to show the inanity of their requests...

1. I'm all out of my medication. If I don't get it I'm going to die!
2. Can't you just give me a few to get me through until I see my doctor some time next year?
3. It's insulin! I have to have it or I can't eat. (Actual quote.)
4. I've been out of it for over a week now and you're not going to refill it for me?
Just because they expired?
Just because my doctor needs an appointment?
Just because I filled a 1 month supply last September and magically ran out yesterday?

Let's equate this with other areas of life....
1. I'm all out of gas. If you don't give me some, I'm going to die!
2. My paycheck hasn't deposited yet? Just give me some money to last until it does.
3. It's my cable! You can't turn it off. I have to be able to watch Dr. Oz to get all my healthy living advice...
4. My cupboards have been empty for over a week! Why didn't you call to tell me I needed food? I've been sitting at my kitchen table with a fork and knife and an empty plate starving.

...and let's not forget to take into account that today is the first of the month.
5. What do you mean my insurance doesn't work anymore? It worked yesterday.
What do you mean my driver's license/tags expired? They weren't expired yesterday.

I don't remember so many people majoring in drama during my formative years in school. I must have lead a sheltered life growing up. I listen to these people all weekend long, beginning at 5:02pm Friday and I wonder: How do these people get through life? How do they make it through each day? How do they manage to set an alarm, wake up, put on clothes, eat breakfast, get in their cars, navigate the streets safely, get to work, perform a job, drive their cars back home, cook dinner, raise children, go to bed and do it all again the next day without accidentally hurting themselves or someone else? Without the help of the pharmacy? They rely on us for so much, it's scary.
If only this were not the reality...
Where are you Charles Darwin?

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