Please Phix

Uber-Tech: Hey, check out these directions. 

CP: Nice. Another provider undone by the complexity of their e-script software. 

UT: Yeah. Really difficult to enter directions when it asks for directions. 

CP: I shall call. This should be phun. 

Silly Lady Answering Phones: Dr. Zoffis. How may I help you?

CP: I am calling because I need a prescription corrected and resent and someone to give your provider a lesson in how to use the software. 

SLAP: What seems to be the problem?

CP: Read the directions. 

SLAP: Simvastatin 40mg. Okay?

CP: No. I'm not a baby; I don't need them read TO me. I am asking you to read them to yourself and see the problem. 

SLAP: Ok. 

CP: Phine. Can you have the prescriber resend it with directions that are actual directions? 

SLAP: What should it say?

CP: How about "Take 1 tablet by mouth daily at bedtime"? Period. 

SLAP: Okay. Can I give it to you orally?

CP: You can, but I'm sure someone would get in trouble. I mean, we only just met and you'd have to come here after work and it's a whole thing so if you could just have the prescriber resend an electronic version, I think that would be easiest phor all. 

UT: I can't believe you. 

CP: What? She started it. 

<2 hours later>

UT: <laughing> Well, we received the "corrected" version. 

CP: Pretty much what I expected.