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Tuesday, June 21, 2022


CPP: What is today's word-of-the-day?
CP: Notice. It is a verb that means "become aware of" according to lexico.com. 
CPP: How did you select today's word?
CP: I heard it in a recent conversation. 
CPP: Please share with the class. 

CP: Welcome to CP's Cosmic Pastilles. How may I help you?
Non-Observant Lady Opining: I noticed I didn't get a call for my husband's Eliquis refill. He missed his dose today because of you. 
CP: You don't say. You noticed we didn't call but you didn't notice his bottle was getting emptier and emptier with each dose you did give him. How selectively observant. Curiouser and Curiouser as my phriend A Little Interesting Clever Explainer was oft heard to quote. 
NO LO: Well?
CP: Water!
NO LO: What?
CP: Second Base! I'm good at these. Keep them coming. 
NO LO: No. Why didn't we receive a call? He missed a dose. 
CP: Phunny you should say that. We last filled his prescription for a 90 days supply 99 days ago. I'm not saying he missed other doses, it is within the realm of (unlikely) possibility that you had a dose or two . . . or 9, extra but. . . he's missed more than A dose in the last 3 months. We also would've filled this about 2 weeks early which means you likely missed the window of opportunity within which to retrieve his refill. I can get it ready now if you like. There's still time to make up the missing dose you forgot to give him. 
NO LO: I also noticed that I didn't get a call for my HCTZ. 
CP: You are on a roll this morning. Have you thought of joining your local ornithologist organization? Obviously observation is obligatory and your penchant for noticing things could really help in the field. 
NO LO: No. It just comes natural. 
CP: Selectively natural. And you would not receive a call phor your medication. 
NO LO: Why not? I'm almost out!
CP: Well the system attempts to fill prescriptions when they are 80% complete. You received a 90 days supply 138 days ago. Not only did you miss your window for my computer to refill it for you, you are 50% of the way into the next, missing refill. You're either Pharmer Jesus feeding thousands of people on 5 loaves and a couple fish, or you're woefully noncompliant. Either way, I can't help you. I can refill it today though.
NO LO: Phine. 

CPP: Ever notice how patients only notice what they want to notice? 
CP: You mean when it's convenient for them to complain about their lack of observance because they just noticed it's a issue? 
CPP: Precisely. 
CP: It still amazes how few people get stranded on the side of the road after running out of gas. 
CPP: Yeah. They can ignore all our phone calls and texts and smoke signals and semaphores but get them in a car with warning lights and they now stop for gas. 
CP: Well running out of gas is embarrassing; running out of your medication means you can project your insecurities and lack of planning on another person to feel better about yourself. 
CPP: 'Murica. 
CP: #HowDoYouNotNoticeTheBottleIsGettingEmptier

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