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Tuesday, July 14, 2020

New Twist On A Classic

CPP: What's your favourite, or at least most popular, question asked of you?
CP: The alcohol one.
CPP: Can I drink with this?
CP: Exactly. People always treat it as if it's a negotiation.

 Pt: How much can I drink with this?
 CP: None.
 Pt: 3?
 CP: Nope.
 Pt: 2?
 CP: Fewer.
 Pt: 1?
 CP: Keep going.

CPP: I asked you this because I know you enjoy answering questions literally and thought you might have a quick quip for this.
CP: I do. Let's play.

Forcing Rx's Over Gums: Can I drink with this?
CP: Yes. Absolutely. In fact, I encourage drinking while taking this medication.
FROG: <excited> Really?
CP: Yes. A dry swallow is a difficult feat and will leave a bad taste in your mouth, or get stuck in your throat.
FROG: That's not what I meant.
CP: I encourage drinking. It is healthy to stay hydrated. It is a difficult task for a pharmacist, what with the "no drinks allowed on the bench" policies and the mandatory masks. Lemme tell ya, 12 hour days in these things really parches the ole gullet and they don't make them yet with straw holes.
FROG: I wanted to know if I can drink. . .
CP: I assume you CAN drink. Water would be the potable liquid of choice. As I said earlier, I solidly encourage drinking while taking this medication.

CPP: You know that's just cruel, right?
CP: Next time he will be more specific. Or get to the point faster.
CPP: Surely someone out there is going to think you're serious.
CP: I am serious. I would totally answer the first question this way. . . knowing my patients and the rapport I have with them, this answer would go over very well with the crowd. And don't call me Shirley.

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