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Wednesday, August 19, 2015

Better to Give Than to Receive

...or so the saying goes. In the pharmacy world, this is often accurate.
Sometimes it is for insurance reasons.
Sometimes it's a relocation.
Sometimes it's because I'm an asshole.
Sometimes it's because the patient is an asshole.
Either way, the initial optimism and joy and thinking to yourself "boom! script growth, baby!" is quickly met with the harsh reality of the pain those scripts will cause you.

Just Another Cynical Pharmacist Openly Thrilled: This is the pharmacist. May I help you?
CP: CP calling for some transfers. You really busy?
JACPOT: Time is relative, my friend. Sounds like more than a few.
CP: I have 8 for you. All for one person.
JACPOT: Any chance you were given numbers?
CP: Any chance Sunderland win the EPL this season?
JACPOT: Right. Who we got?
CP: Last name Baggins. First name Douche.
JACPOT: What? Really?
CP: Um. Yes.
JACPOT: (loudly announcing to rest of staff, rather muffled) ...seriously! she's transferring. Yeah, no shit! Oh this is news most welcome. Hooray!
CP: So I take it...
JACPOT: ...Phew. Hey everyone. I'm buying tonight!
CP: Well she sounds like an old sailor, port to port. How long did it take you to get rid of her?
JACPOT: About 3 months of pure hell.
CP: Well once I have these 8 copies, you can start the clock on me.
JACPOT: Good luck! (and somewhere in the background, I could swear I heard Munchkins singing...ding dong the witch is dead.)

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