Damned If You Do ...

... Damned If You Don't.

Let's face it, you're not going to make everyone happy.
Correction. In pharmacy, you're not going to make anyone happy.

That's better. As we all know, pharmacies make too many phone calls to patients; so many in fact, that patients can't keep them straight and decide to just call us for clarification. It's not their phault, but that of the "helpful compliance systems" developed by pharmacies. However, for every person complaining we call too often, there is someone equally sore we do not call enough. For this reason I say we are damned if we do and damned if we don't.

<Day 1>
Understandably Wants It Now: <at the counter> I need to have this filled.
CP: First, this prescription will require prior authorization. Second, we do not have it in stock as it is quite expensive. Third, we will not order it until the prior auth has been approved. Do you agree to these terms and conditions as I have explained them to you?
UWIN: I wholeheartedly understand and agree.

<Day 2>
CP: We are calling to inform you that your prior auth has been approved.
UWIN: Hooray. I'll be right down.
CP: We have to order it.
UWIN: But I brought it in yesterday.
CP: And the prior auth went through today. Now we will order it. It was all in the agreement you agreed to agree with when you left your prescription with us. (Besides, I could have waited until tomorrow to call you and tell you it was approved at which time my order would have arrived and you'd've been none the wiser. Just sayin'.)
UWIN: This is ridiculous.
CP: No. Here is what is ridiculous.

If I order it, your prior auth won't go through and I'm stuck with it.
If I don't order it, you get mad because I don't have it for 1 more day.
If I order it AND the prior auth goes through, the co-pay is too high and now you don't want it.
If I don't order it and the prior auth is rejected, you get mad because you want to pay cash for it now.
If I order it, you decide to transfer it to a store closer to home because they have it in stock.
If I don't order it, you complain that we never have anything in stock even though this is new.
If I order it, you decide to call the prescriber and have her change the medication to something in stock, cheaper, or preferred on your insurance.

Whatever we do, it is wrong in someone's eyes. While just my appearance at work is often enough to make angels and technicians sing, for some, the pitchforks and flaming torches appear.