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Monday, July 1, 2013

Boggles the Mind

Watch the amazing adventures of the welfare mind.
A seemingly pleasant fellow approaches the pharmacy counter, pictures of his newborn baby in hand. Bragging about the first addition to his family and handing out cigars while smiling at all of the "congratulations" being tossed his way, this man is here to pick up his precious bundle's prescription. Since she is fresh from the oven, like warm rolls in your kitchen, she is not ready for insurance yet. No bother. The pharmacy will gladly call them to see if any override may be provided for her in your benefits. It is an innocent little newborn after all. Father gladly accepts this and says he will hang out in the free library (magazine section) perusing the periodicals until we notify him of our progress.
Hours later (okay, it was 27 minutes of being on hold), and no progress having been made after being transferred to 3 people, it's time to page back Herr Father to update the situation...
HF: Well, any luck?
CP: Alas, no. There are still trying to fix it, but it doesn't look promising. They said coverage is set to begin the first of next month, but today may not happen.
HF: I understand. What are my options?
CP: First, since it's only $9.00, pay that today and get your baby her needed supplements and enjoy every precious second you can with her instead of standing here.
Second, wait around and hope they magically fix it before we close in 7 hours.
Third, and I do not recommend this, leave it here until the First when her benefits are active and come back then.
HF: Well, since it's only like $10, I can probably get it. But I'm reading this great tome at the moment so I can stick around a bit.
CP: Sure. Keep celebrating with the customers and showing off those great pictures.

<An hour later, Herr Father returns to the counter>
HF: I was waiting on a prescription for my bouncing bundle of joy.
Intern: Of course. Let me check on that. It appears CP has not heard back yet. We just tried it and again, it has failed to go through. Are you going to just pay for it?
HF: Well, no. But I really got into this magazine so I want to buy that today instead. I'll come back in a day or two in case they figure it out.
Intern: Um. Ooookay. Well, your total is $9.57 with tax.
HF: Great. Thanks.
Intern: Yeah. Sure. Congratulations on that baby. Remember, your interests no longer come first. Hers do.
HF: I know. She means everything to me. Thanks again.
<HF walks away>

Intern: You know he bought that magazine right?
CP: Instead of the prescription?
Intern: Yes.
CP: Sweet. <To Tech> Told you. That'll be $5!

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