More Phun With Dick And Jane

Jane is a pharmacist.

Dick is a patient. 

Jane: Hello. May I help you? 

Dick: Yes. I am here to <phone rings> pick up my prescription. 

Jane: And the name? 

Dick: <phone rings> Dick. 

Jane: Okay. Let me find that. 

Dick: <answers phone, loudly> "sorry, yeah, just picking up my prescription at the pharmacy. yeah, sorry, hold on, the pharmacy lady is back." 

Jane: I have a few things to review with you about your new medication. 

Dick: <yeah, sorry, hang on> Which one? 

Jane: Valtrex. 

Dick: What's it for? 

Jane: The Herp. 

Dick: Can't you see I'm on the phone? That's private. 

Jane: You know that just because the phone rings, it does not mean you need to answer it, right? You revoked HIPAA when you invited a third party into the conversation. 

#DontBeADick

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Jane is a pharmacist. 

Dick is a patient. 

Dick: Hello? 

Jane: This is CP Jane calling from your pharmacy. 

Dick: Okay. What do you need? 

Jane: I am calling to see if you are going to pick up your medication that has been here for 10 days.

Dick: I. AM. AT. A. FUNERAL! You picked a fine time to bother me. Have you no shame? 

Jane: Sorry, my store phone didn't come with the missile guidance system that allows me to target everyone's location. Seriously though. Who takes a phone to a phuneral? Better yet, who ANSWERS a phone at a phuneral? You do realise that just because it rings, does not require you to answer it. 

#DontBeADick

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Jane is a pharmacist. 

Dick is a patient. 

Jane: I have 3 prescriptions for you. 

Dick: Okay. <answers phone in car via bluetooth>

Jane: Your total is $5.29. 

Voice In Car Talking Over Radio Is Annoying: What do you want on your pizza?

Dick: <hands over card> Here you go. 

Jane: I like green olives and bacon. 

VICTORIA: Who was that?

Dick: The pharmacist. 

Jane: I like pizza. 

Dick; She was talking to me. 

Jane: I wasn't sure. Since you felt the need to answer while we engaged in a personal transaction, I thought this was a conference call. Maybe you'll drop me a slice. 

Dick: No. 

Jane: Okay. Well with your new cholesterol medication, you need to cut down on the bacon and meats and cheeses. Perhaps a sardine and avocado pizza would befit your diagnosis. 

Dick: Don't talk about my medication while I'm on the phone. 

Jane: Unlike you, I have an obligation to discuss this. In fact, I am required to discuss it with you. Next time the phone rings, consider not answering it. Texting would have avoided this. Seriously though, avocado and sardines. Try it. 

#EveryTimeAPhoneRingsAnAssholeAnswersItInThePharmacy

#DontBeADick 

#PharmacyPhuckery