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Monday, June 19, 2017

Lower Your Expectations

Explain your problem to me.
I will address the issue and attempt to phix it.
Once I have reached a conclusion, I will present it to you.
Whether or not it is satisfactory is not my problem.
It is, however, the answer, and continued arguing on your part will not change the results.
Think of it as yelling at your TV after the other team scores. Or yelling at the scientists because their science disproved your personal beliefs.

CP: How may I disappoint you today?
Dude Wants A ReFund: I have this discount card and I want a refund.
CP: Okay. Where and when did you get it?
DWARF: The Other Pharmacist at another store gave it to me. I'd been paying $500 a month for this because my insurance won't cover it. She told me the drug rep came in and left these cards. She was able to give me money back.
CP: Okay. I will try. We filled this only one time for you, in April. I'm not sure it will work.
DWARF: She said if you have a problem, just call her. All you have to do is change it to this card and give me a refund.
CP: That's all, huh? Did you activate the card?
DWARF: No. She took care of everything.
CP: Okay. <makes magic in the computer. pushes buttons. pulls levers. bells and whistles sound like it's a Willy Wonka computer system>
DWARF: That sounds promising.
CP: Unfortunately, the results were negative. We lost him, sir.
DWARF: What do you mean?
CP: She activated this card on 15th May. We filled your prescription 15th April. In other words, we filled the prescription before coverage was active.
DWARF: So I'm just out $100.00?
CP: Technically you've been out $500 for the last couple months. That would be like playing the lottery and when your numbers don't hit, complaining to the lottery commission that you're out the multi-million dollar jackpot. You didn't have to buy the lottery ticket any more than you had to buy the prescription.
DWARF: <stink eye> She said you'd be able to do it. She did it.
CP: She did because she activated the card on the day she filled your prescription. If you have new insurance that won't take effect until August, they won't retroactively pay for things before you were covered under their policy. If I have to purchase a new washer and dryer in August, I can't invoke the Memorial Day sale that Lowe's held just to get myself a discount. "But I didn't need to buy them when they were on sale. You need to give me that price today, three months later."
DWARF: You don't need to explain it to me.
CP: Usually people stop arguing with me by now. You're still standing here with a look of incredulity on your face and trying to get me to change the fact that the discount card denied the claim.
DWARF: This is why I don't come here.
CP: Actually it is because you live across town and we were the only pharmacy that had that strength in stock on the day you needed it. Sometimes, even @TheOtherPharmacist can be wrong.

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