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Monday, March 23, 2015

Door-to-Door

In a world overcrowded with pharmacies trying to one-up each other, one pharmacist is on a mission. His goal today? Selling Comprehensive Medication Reviews door-to-door vis-a-vis vacuum and encyclopedia salesmen of decades past. Today we join him on his quest for the Holy Grail (someone to say "yes").

1. Would you be interested in a CMR today? I could just come inside and demo my services for you. Just 25 minutes of your time and I can have you on your way to a happier, healthier you. Right here I see that you are taking a Statin. Did you know…? <door slams>

2. <Tips fedora>
Good day, ma'am. I would like to show you the power of the new CMR 3000. With this lovely service, you too can turn your frown upside down. Side effects from medication? Too many medications? Drug interactions from all those tablets you have to take 8 times a day? No more! With the CMR 3000 we can reduce those unwanted outcomes, cut your daily regimen, and minimize the burden on you so you can get on with your life and enjoy each day better. May I come in? <door slams>

3. Are you one of the millions of people out there who are going to die? My name is Syrio Forel and I say: "Not today". With a quick investment of just 20 minutes, I can demonstrate for you the powers of the CMR 3K and how it can save your life. <hears the phrase, "Chopper, sick balls!" and takes off running.>

4. Do you do drugs? Can I have some?

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